SO-Shelby+R.

** Introduction:**
Hi, my name is Shelby and I am in Mrs. Hawkenson's 6th grade english class first hour. We have been working on out 1001 tales for about 2 weeks and it has been fun! I have lots of friends, their names are, McKenna, Libbi, Hannah, Rachael, Morgan, Jessica, and many more! They are the best! My favorite TV show would be "Ghost Whisperer." It is a //REALLY// good show about a girl that can talk to ghosts. Me and my mom both like this show. We like shows like that. I like to be with my family and friends. My hobbies are, sports, hanging out with friends, cooking, and more! I also like to write stories. I am good at it, but other people say that I should be an auther when I am older, but i dont know. When I hang out with my friends, we usually go to the mall, so I //REALLY// like that! Me and my friends can //ALWAYS// make something fun! <3 Shelby <3

**Paste your story here:**
** Ellen ** By: Shelby Risen

One very dark rainy day, Ellen was walking to school. It was cloudy and rainy. She was soaking wet with her braids coming un-done. When she finally got to school, she was one hour late. So, she had to stay after class for ten minutes. This day wasn’t a very good one for Ellen, but it was about to get worse. When Ellen entered her next class she was still wet. She was a very shy girl, but had many friends. This class room was a dark kind of scary room to some of the students. Their teacher was mean and nasty. She didn’t like anyone. Mostly kids. She always picks one student in the class to pick on that day. And today was Ellen’s turn. She gave Ellen about three hours of homework, and if she didn’t come back to school the next day with it done, there was no telling what would happen to her. The next day when she came to school, it was a nicer day. But, she forgot to do one really important thing. She forgot to do some of her homework for Ms. Schneider’s class. When she realized what she had done, it was too late. When that nasty old teacher came up to Ellen and asked about the homework, Ellen looked up at her and said, “No, I forgot to do it. I had so much to do last night. I didn’t have enough time. But, I can get it to you by either the end of the day, or tomorrow morning. I promise.” Ms. Schneider looked down at her and then grabbed her by her arm and pulled her out into the hall way and said, “No, you will not turn it into me today or tomorrow. You get one chance and one chance only. This is the way it is in my class and this is the way it always has been. Go call home and then leave, now.” Ellen walked down the hall way to the office and she called home. Her mother answered and Ellen told her everything. When her mother found out about everything, she drove down to the school as fast as she could. She was various. When her mother got to the school, she walked down to her teacher’s room and asked if she could talk to her out in the hall. When the teacher walked out into the hall with Ellen’s mother, her mother said, “//I don’t want you to EVER touch my daughter like that again!//” Ms. Schneider looked at her mother and said, “I don’t think I did anything wrong. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go and teach a class.” Then she walked away back into her class room. Ellen’s mother walked down to the principal’s office to get Ellen, but she wasn’t there. Her mother asked the lady at the office if she had seen her leave. She replied, “Yes, she left about 20 minutes ago. She said she was going to go out and wait for you in the car.” Her mother said thank you and then left to go bring Ellen home. When she got out to the car, Ellen was in there falling asleep. Her mother didn’t say anything because she didn’t want to wake her up. When they got home, her mother carried her inside and put her in her bed. When Ellen woke up she walked down stairs and saw a note on the kitchen table. She picked it up and read it. It said, “Dear Ellen, I have to go back to work. But, if you need anything, you can call me. I //will// answer my phone. Love, Your mom” Ellen called her mom. No answer. She called her again. No answer. So, she walked down to her mothers’ office. When she found out that she was on a business trip for the day, she walked home. She was so mad at her mom for not telling her that she wasn’t really paying attention. A car was coming her way, she didn’t see it. The driver wasn’t really paying attention to her either. The car was coming fast. Then, it was too late. Ellen was hit by the car. The driver stopped as fast as she could and then got out of her car. She ran over to Ellen and called the ambulance. They got there as fast as they could. They brought her to the hospital. They were calling her mother, but there was no answer. Finally they got a hold of her. She raced down to the hospital. When she got to the hospital, she was in her room sleeping. Her mother felt so bad about not answering her phone when she new it was her calling. She felt it was all her fault. When Ellen woke up, she wouldn’t talk to her mom. Her mom looked at her and said, “Honey, I’m sorry about this whole thing. I couldn’t answer my phone.” About 3 weeks after the accident, Ellen was still in a wheel chair. She has wanted to get out of it for a while now. And she has been asking her mom to let her just use crutches. But she always says no. “Mom, can I //please// get out of this thing. I’m just fine without it.” Her mom looked at her and said, “Fine, we will go to the doctors office tomorrow and we will see what he says.” Ellen looked at her mom and smiled. “Thank you mom.” Ellen said with a smile on her face. The next day they went to the doctor’s office to see what her doctor said. When they got into his office, he started to look at her leg and then said, “I think that she is ready to get out of it.” Ellen looked at her mom and smiled. “I will be right back with your crutches.” The doctor said while he was walking out of the office. Ellen looked at her mom and said, “I told you that I was ready” and then she smiled and gave her mom a BIG hug. “Yes hunny, I know that’s what you said.” Then she laughed. The doctor came back in with the crutches. Ellen slowly tried to stand up and get the crutches in her hands, then put the under her armpits. She started walking around with them and she was doing well until she hit the doctor’s stool. Then she fell on the doctor’s lap. She looked up at him and said, “Thank you” then she laughed as she was getting back up. When they left, her mom helped her into the car. “Mom, I can do it myself” Ellen said to her mom and then __tried__ to get into the car. She looked up at her mom and then said, “Never mind, I think I need some help” Her mom looked at her and kind of laughed. “Ok.” When they got home, her friends were all waiting there for her to see what happened. When they saw her without the wheel chair, they all ran up to her, and one at a time gave her a hug. She looked at everyone and said, “Thank you, you guys. I’m //so// happy that I’m out of that stupid wheel chair.” One of her least favorite friends looked at her and did kind of a weird smile. Ellen looked back at her and said, “Well, no hug from me //best// friend?” Ellen walked up to her and gave her a big hug, then when she stopped hugging her and looked at her and did a sarcastic smile. Then she just walked away back to her mom’s side. Her mom looked at her and then said, “Well everyone, you ready to go and have a party?” All of the kids looked at each other and then yelled, “YEAH!” All of the kids ran into the house and had the party. After the party everyone went home. About two months later, Ellen was just fine and she didn’t need the crutches or the wheel chair again! She was able to do anything that she could do before and more! She had a lot more friends too. She started sports but kept her grades up! She was one of the best students in her class, even in the whole school! She was the same person but a different person all at the same time! And thats how Ellen ends up. She has a great life, great friends, but more importantly, good family!
 * 3 WEEKS PASSED**

**Questions for Peer Reviewers**
(Think in terms of questions you would like to ask the author.) HI, I dont really like my story that much! LOL. Thanks Kyli!! <3 Shelby <3 hey shelby i read ur story luv it so great ♥ kyli  hey Shelby! you really should paste your story here! im desperate to read it! what is your story about anyways? i really want to know! please post it up!  1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author?