CI-Shala

1001 Flat Tales Project

My Name: SHALA RODRIGUEZ My Age:13 My Hometown: PUEBLO COLORADO My Hobbies: PLAY SOFTBALL My Favorites: LISTENING TO MUSIC AND DOING MY HAIR Other things you should know about me:

 Well you know how to make up stories. They kind of get tired of listening to the same stuff over and over again, but not mine so here it goes. One beautiful day in Florida Susan and Bob, husband and wife were trying to plan a vacation for just the two of them. So bob says to Susan “WHAT ABOUT HAWII HONEY” and Susan says that sounds great I will call the and book us are tickets right now. Bob was excited zoomed in the room and started packing his and his wife’s bags. Than Susan comes in the room and says “GREAT NEWS I JUST BOOKED OUR TICKETS AND THEY SAID OUR PLANE LEAVES TOMOROW MORNING AT 9AM” great said bob. So then comes the next day Susan and Bob get in their car and on the road again. They pull up in the airport parking lot and with smiles on their faces they walk in the airport and Bob is excited. Then they go up to the front and tell the lady we are here for the 9am flight to Hawaii and the lady looks at them like they are crazy and she says “IM SORRY TO BREAK IT TO YOU BUT THAT FLIGHT HAS BEEN DELAYED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE I AM VERY SORRY” Bobs says what are we going to do Susan our plane has been delayed and Susan says okay well lets not panic right away. Later on that afternoon Susan says “I HAVE A GRAET IDEA YOU KNOW MY FRIEND TODD REMEMBER HE HAS HIS OWN AIRPLANE I WILL CALL HIM AND TELL HIM TO FLY US OUT THEIR!!!” “HELLO TODD THIS IS SUSAN HEY ME AND MY HUSBAND ARE STRANDED AT THE AIRPORT OUR PLANE TO HAWAII HAD GOTTEN DELAYED…DO YOU THINK YOU CAN START YOUR PLANE AND COME FLY US OUT TO HAWAII?” “SURE NO PROMBLEM I WILL BE RIGHT THEIR” "THANK YOU VERY MUCH YOU ARE A LIFE SAVOR." So Bob and Susan are waiting for Todd and what do you know their he is so they get in the plane and that is my story on how Bob and Susan got to Hawaii before sundown.
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This is Grant. I like the idea of the story, but be careful with your grammer, and it was a little short.

Try using a thesaurus for your words, the vocabulary was a bit bland.

Great job!!!



1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?
 * Starting - March 29 (2009): **

The plot is original but it gets kind of boring. You should make it more exciting and more interesting and expand it more.

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

The problems that the characters face are not that suspenseful. It's kind of predictable what is going to happen.

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

The characters are life like and they are likeable but not that enjoyable because they seem like they are kind of old and boring.

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see // and //hear // and //experience // the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

I can vision the story. In the revision I think you should expand more on like what they will do in Hawaii.

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author?

You need to improve on your spelling and grammar.

Technical Details
1. Punctuation, grammar, word choice.
 * Starting - April 19 (2009): **

The Alien King's Decision
1. On the level of story-telling: if you were the King (or the aliens), would you allow this story-teller to live another day? If no,why not?
 * Starting May 3 (2009): **

2. Be specific, try not to merely write, " this was good", instead explain what was good about it and why.

3. Nominate "Hall of Fame" stories. <span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif'; text-decoration: none;">