VV+Sophie

**Introduction:**
Include some or all of the following, as well as a link to your blog: first name, what you like to do in and out of school, favourites (food, sport, hobby, TV show, video game, etc.), places visited, future plans, claim to fame. My name is [|Sophie] and this is one of the 1001 tales. The link on my name leads to my blog. Everyone in our class has had a blog since we started in October. There I say some of the things I like to do. Like soccer, volleyball, soccer, swimming, soccer, biking... Mostly sports. I love sports. I also love, and I mean LOVE, sushi. It is my number one favourite food, even though I don't eat it that often. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this story and leave me some suggestions to improve.

Let There Be Light! “Flip on the light, it’s to dark in here.” Alice’s boss, Mr. Hemingway, says impatiently. Silence fills the small board room where they held there weekly meeting until Alice finally replied a simple… “No” Everyone in the room starts whispering to each other, shocked that she would put her job on the line. “We are environmentalists, but our building uses more energy and produces more green house gases then anyone else in the whole town. But it’s not just us! The rest of the town is awful. The energy they use and the world they create is not good” She said. Standing up for what she believes in. “Fine.” her boss exclaims, just wanting to leave. “We will get rid of the micro wave.” When the people in the room heard that they went ballistic! They were the greediest bunch ever. “Why don’t we get together with another town, and help each other. Think of what we could create with all of us!” Alice shouts about to stand up on the table. She was definitely feeling the power. “Very well. You are all dismissed. But, wh…” He was cut off by a crowd of people dashing for the door. “Thank-you Mr. Hemmingway. Don’t worry you will not be disappointed! “Sure” he says leaving the room. Alice waited for him to shut the door. Once he did she clicked her heels together. She had done a good thing.

Alice had organized to meet with the other town by the next week. The other town’s environment association’s boss, Mr. Burke, and assistant, Trevor who is also an environmentalist, came to the town to meet Mr. Hemmingway and Alice. “Hello, Mr. Hemmingway!” Mr. Burke says shaking him warmly by the hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you Alice” Trevor says shaking //her// by the hand as the two bosses walk off together discussing the difference between brand name and no name cereal, totally off task. Alice takes out a binder and starts flipping through it. “I have a lot of ideas.” “Would you like to discuss them over a coffee?” Trevor asks. “That would be lovely.” When they arrive at the noisy, loud, distracting café, they discuss ideas, the flaws in there bosses, and about themselves. They both have very strong feelings about the environment, and they had always been aware of this awful situation.

After three months of gruesome work, failure after failure, and a million fundraisers, Mary and Trevor came up with… A light bulb. Powered by water.

The two towns rejoiced at the reveal of their invention. “Using just one teaspoon of water, it will be powered for one month.” Trevor announces. After the announcement, Mr. Hemmingway and Mr. Burke pulled Alice and Trevor aside to speak to them. “That was wonderful!” said Mr. Burke. “I agree.” said Mr. Hemmingway. “How did you do it?” “Two brains are better than one.” said Trevor. “I agree.” replied Alice. One week following the reveal, the light bulbs went on sale in every store across the two towns. That same day, everyone in the town purchased enough light bulbs for there whole house. After just one month, the two towns were the environmentally friendly in North America!

Thanks for reading! The one thing I would like to hear from you would be... Was this story easy to follow?

**Questions for Peer Reviewers**
(Think in terms of questions you would like to ask the author.)

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)? I think that your story was really intresting idea. I liked how you decided to use hydro electric power to power a light bulb because i dont think that anyone else has thought of that. Great work. Some things i think that you should work on are developing the story. How did they find out how to make the light bulb? 2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed? I think that you should have tried to make it more interesting. Maybe Mr.Hemingway was against Alice's idea for a while until she pursuaded him. 3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions? Maybe you could try to make Alice stand out as a more important caracheter and Mr.Hemingway more evil and greedy. 4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story? All i get from the story is Alice, Hemingway and blanc faces in a dark room. Alice and other assistant at a empty cafe. The faces are all blanc. Maybe you could give them clothes, faces, and more discriptive settings. 5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author? I think you should work on the stories development. Make it more intresting and descriptive.