SO-Ella+G.

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Hiya, My name is Ella Glaser. I have 1 brother and 1 sister. I like to play softball, basketball, and volleyball. I have a doggy named Rufus. My favorite food is about anything but FRUIT!! I like to hang out with my friends at the mall or at the movies. I really want to become a teacher when I grow up and I have wanted that ever since I was a little girl. I lived in Ohio for about 3 years. I have always wanted to live in Australia. My favorite color is red and pink! My favorite subject is Math or lunch (does that count as a subject)?
 * Introduction:**

Tootles ;-) and have a great day!!

**Paste your story here:**
** Singing Sensation ** By: Ella Glaser

Today was the day, the day of tryouts, the day of tryouts for the talent show. I’ve been exited about this day out of all days because it has been my dream, Jamie Ritchee’s dream to be the next Ridge High Middle School talent show winner! Everyday I would go to school, go home and //practice practice practice//. Everyone says that I will not get in because my act is not strong enough; I know that but even if I just get in, I’m in it to win it. “Honey you always say that,” says my mom (Franny Ritchee) whenever I say that. Okay well now’s the time to beat some Ridge High Middle School Talent show auditions! “Hello Ridge High Middle School students,” Mr. McCanned announced in my first period classroom. “Today we have the auditions. We will take anyone and anybody, BUT… if we do not pick you, you can’t do anything to sabotage other contestants. Thank you and have a nice day. Auditions will take place at 1:30 in the auditorium today.” I was so exited about having the auditions at 1:30. I just couldn’t wait; I leaned over to my friend Sylvia Poete and said, “I can’t wait! Are you going to try out?” “Idk, my mom took my phone away so I don’t think I can,” said Sylvia. “Oh, okay but one little question, how does that affect the talent show?” I said very annoyed. Sometimes Sylvia makes me so mad she doesn’t participate in a lot of things she is always texting and using texting words like idk, omg and ttyl. I always tell myself does anyone appreciate my presence instead of my parents? Ding, ding, ding, Time for my second period; three more away from the talent show at fifth period or otherwise at 1:30. At my fuchsia red locker the bitter coldness wiped my face when Laura strutted pasted me with a little pop in her walk. She really chills me to the bone sometimes. Just because she won the talent show every year so far she thinks I’m no good. I always get in and usually come in forth place but still I’m okay right? I would ask my mom that and of course she would say honey you always are the first place winner for me, in my heart! But that is what mom’s say. I closed my locker to get ready for second period. In Ms. Greed’s science classroom the tan gray walls make me feel like I’m in a cellar, and there is a big green chalkboard in the front of the room that I always want to write on it. No stuffed animals, no rainbow bright colors, no pictures just a boring old school room. “What is the continental drift about?” Ms Greed said. “Sylvia, do you know?” Sylvia replied as always, “Idk, did we learn about this before?” “Ms. Greed, Ms. Greed I know, I know!” I say with a belching voice. “I know you do,” Ms Greed said annoyed, “but you can’t always blurt out my name have //patience//!” I just sank down in my hideaway for the 45 minutes left of the period just a waiting for the bell to ring for the third period. I couldn’t wait I kept saying be patient, be patient. I couldn’t, I just couldn’t wait! I couldn’t take it all I just couldn’t. Everything became black with little white specks appearing and going, every sound was drowning out, I started sweating, my throat dried up. //Bam//, I fainted… I woke up in the nurses office my mom and dad (Paul Ritchee) staring at me say, “Are you okay? What happened?” I opened my unique green and blue eyes (the contacts make them that way) and the first sentence that came out of me was, “What time is it?” Mrs. Stratter the nurse replied it is, “Well, it was 10:30 when you fainted… “Uh, I asked what time is it right now!” I stammered! “I think someone fell on her head when she fainted,” Mrs. Stratter said in a baby voice. “Okay I just need to know the dumb time only two to four numbers in time formation!” I said kind of calmly. “It is about one and forty-five.” The nurse said. “What?” “It is about one and forty-six.” “Oh. What?” “It is about one and forty-seven.” “Can you please just tell me the regular time?” “I said all these times 1:45, 1:46, 1:47, and right now it is 1:48.” Mrs. Stratter said. “What...” “I said…” “I know what you said but we have been fighting for about four minutes and in two minutes the talent show auditions are ending.” “Sorry to break everything up but your father and I have to go. See you at home honey! And be safe.” My mother said. “Okay, I love you bye.” I said thankfully to not to talk to the nurse but when my parents left I almost rushed out of there but then Mrs. Stratter stopped me and asked, “Jamie, what were going to do for the talent show? I mean you will not make to so can you do what ever you were going to do.” “Fine, but I was hoping I could show it in front of Mr. McCanned.” I replied. Then I started my act, my act of singing. “La…La…La…La…La…La…La…” “Hey, want some little guidance to get you better. Sing with more feeling, be stronger with your singing I know you can.” Then she winked. I left because she has always freaked me out and with the winking I didn’t know what to think! I went to my sixth period and Sylvia came over to me, “Hey, what happened over there? Anyways guess what, guess what!” “What?” I said trying to sound eager about it. “Well ya know how ya wanted me to try out for the talent show…” “Yah, what?” “Well I did and I got in he said I can dance like there is no tomorrow!” “Oh great job!” I said but I almost cried! The next day was the talent show I had to go see it! I had to go see Sylvia dance. It wouldn’t be the same seeing her get the lime light and not me it was like a nightmare waiting to be dreamt. In science we did an experiment and it had vinegar. Sylvia dipped her whole head in the whole glass container and she said that she got a chemical reaction. Which is not very true; she then had to go to the nurse. Which then I told her, “Be careful she really gets you going.” “Jamie, can you do your act in the talent show!” she said to me. “But why me?” I asked, “did you think that you did something wrong and that is why you smelled that vinegar?” “NO!” She yelled, “I just look like I’m sick and I don’t want to embarrass myself!” “Oh well okay that is okay with me I would do anything to get into that talent show! For my name is…” Sylvia intruded me, “Just one thing never ever do that again!” I had to //practice practice// practice otherwise I would lose for Sylvia. So in all my classes I hummed the song that I was going to sing. //Hum…hum…hum… hum...!// Then the bell rang. I ran to the auditorium. It was all decorated with white lights and streamers and everything looked beautiful. “So you made Sylvia drop out didn’t you that means you are disqualified!” said a distance voice. “No I didn’t she got sick and she said I would fill in for her!” I said back! “Well I will still win you know that right. Sylvia made a bad decision to fill you in!” I responded, “We will see about that, Laura…” I was the bomb at the talent show! But I was still very afraid that Laura was going to win! Finally, the award ceremony I said to myself. Mr. McCanned read them off… “Margie Mar in 3rd place…” I did a deep gulp if I get in 2nd place I will die because I mouthed off to Laura! “And is 2nd place is…” “Jamie Ritchee!” You probably know who got in first place! I don’t want to talk about that anymore. But you might want to know one more thing after the show… Sylvia came over to me that night not texting or talking to someone on the phone and said, “You know what I like about you!” “What?” I said. “You help me out when ever I need you! You are a hero!” So that is the story I was who I was and a hero. Even if no one listens to you, or you aren’t very good at something you are a HERO to someone you just have to be patient.

**Questions for Peer Reviewers**
(Think in terms of questions you would like to ask the author.)

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?

♥Yes, because is like a concurse where two girls are fighting the first place in a school concurse.-- Giuliana Gonzales

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

♥Yes there are some problems that exist between Jamie & Laura, but is an interesting competition. MMM... yeah because Jamie had the 2nd place and that is good, but I want that she (Jamie) won, not Laura. -- Giuliana Gonzales

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

♥I like the characterization their dialogues. -- Giuliana Gonzales

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

♥I think that yes because have a lot of adjetives and that help so much in the comprehension of the story. -- Giuliana Gonzales

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author?

♥The final part because it leave you in like-what did Jamie did about the wining of Laura. -- Giuliana Gonzales