Joel

**Siblings:1 brother** Feel free to upload your podcast or a picture if you like.
 * **Hi, my name is Joel **
 * Grade: 7th**
 * Best Holiday: Christmas **
 * Birth Month: April **
 * Career Goals: Be a doctor and soccer player **
 * Favorite Movies(s): I love you man **
 * Favorite Food: Quesadillas **
 * Favorite Snack: Sandwich **
 * Favorite soft drink: Sunny D **
 * Favorite Subject: Gym **
 * Pet Peeve: Dumb people **
 * Pets: 9 Fishes **

HEADLESS HORSEMAN Once upon a time there was a guy name __stick__. The reason he’s name was stick was because he was literally skinny as a stick. Stick had a job he’s job was being a teacher. He thought that all his students that he was cool but he was wrong. All the students made fun of him behind his back and called him names like pickle face and other names. One day in a regular evening he came at school and found a party invitation at his desk. He opened it and the party was at 7:00 p.m. and the invitation said to dress nicely. Stick went back to his wooden house to take a shower and get dressed. When stick came outside he filled himself with food so people would not make fun of him. He got his horse and went of to the party through the dark and scary woods. When he came to the party he was shivering and scared. He went to the lake to put water on his face and then all of a sudden he slipped into the lake and got parch wet. After that he waited for an hour until he’s clothes dry. When he got in the party guys were laughing because of he’s clothes. When everyone was dancing stick was sitting on a chair in a corner waiting for someone to ask him to dance with him. He was drinking some juice and crying in the corner. Then a girl name Jennifer asked stick to dance with her. They were dancing to T.I. live your life. When they were done dancing they were both so very thirsty. They both drank some strong fruit punch. When the party was over stick went outside and grabbed his white horse and rode back to his house with a low rider. When stick left he fell off of his horse because of he’s horses low rider. When stick went through the woods he started to get scared and almost did number 2 in his pants. Stick started hearing noises in the woods and at first he thought there were rats but then he saw a man on top of a horse without a head. Stick said who are you and the headless horseman said nothing. Then the headless horseman started getting closer to stick and then stick started running with his horse. Every time stick looked back he saw the headless horseman getting closer and closer. When stick was running he hit a branch tree and fell on mud and that made the headless horseman harder to look for him. When the headless horseman was looking for stick, stick made a run for his house. When stick was running he saw his house close and then saw the headless horseman right behind him. When stick got to his house ha tried to open the door but it was lock and the worst thing happened stick didn’t have the keys. When the headless horseman was in front of stick face stick thought he was dead but then the headless horseman said you would live if you beat me in a break dance but if you don’t you die. Dan Dan Dan !!!!!! They went inside the house and started dancing stick was doing the wind but the head less horseman was doing the windmill but at the end the headless horseman beat stick at dancing. Then the headless horseman took a pumpkin and smashed it on his face and killed him. The next day they went to stick’s house and found him dead on his table eating pumpkin. Everyone thought stick was allergic to pumpkin and died case of it. Then they buried stick and saw his face had a pumpkin sigh and that meant the headless horseman was there but everyone thought that was just a dirty lying story. That is the story of the heedless horseman.

Questions for Peer Reviewers

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?

The plot is original, don't get me wrong. It was sort of funny and creepy-like but it was entertaining. The only thing is that the parts where you made it REALLY original and it got a little out of hand. Sometimes you got off topic and it got kind of.... stupid in a way. Because the story is about a headless horseman, not break dancing. I just think that you should take the plot and stick to it the next time you make a story. 2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

I think that the story is very interesting and it adds lots of suspense and tension but I think that you should tone down the suspense and tension in some areas of the story so then it builds up and up and up until the man dies with the face of a pumpkin sighing. 3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?  The character, Stick, was well described but the “headless horseman” could have been more described. Maybe you can describe his entrance better like “The horseman came into the dark, frightening forest. With my bones chilling at the sight I waited to wake up from the dream.” Maybe add something chilling and different, instead of… break dancing. 4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you see and hear and experience the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?  The details don’t really add the chilling part of the story. And the part where it says that the man dying with a pumpkin face??? I didn’t really get that very clearly. You should put more detailing things, other than break dancing. 5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author? <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"> There isn’t that much to suggest except for…


 * 1) 1 Try to detail more and add more of a chilling note to it.
 * 2) 2 I liked the suspense and it gets you started but then when you start break dancing it sort of… ruins the interest. So maybe find another way to end it, like a fight or something to build up the action.

Natalie ISKL

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author?

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author? ||