CI-Matt

1001 Flat Tales Project

My Name: Matt My Age: 13 My Hometown: Pueblo My Hobbies: Karate, reading, and drawing My Favorites: Chinese food, video games Other things you should know about me:

**__My Story __**__ (Paste Here) __   One day somewhere in England, at the event center, Professor Muttonchop was (as usual) being cruel to his four monkeys. He was making them do flips, cartwheels, and handstands for the clapping audience. Now these were no ordinary monkeys, they were the only four Albino Tamarin Monkeys in the world. Of course (from the monkey’s point of view,) the meanest, richest, old man had to buy them. Little did the old man know, the monkeys were going to be the downfall of his success, they just didn’t know it yet… “Whoo, I hate doing those kind of tricks for him, it’s bad for my asthma!” exclaimed Grace, (the oldest,) as she inhaled a long puff through the inhaler she had stolen from the gift shop. “Well, he won’t efen lef me eat!” retorted George between mouthfuls of peanut butter. “Well, at least you two are used to this,” Danna said, “Devin and I haven’t been doing handstands as long as you!” Devin’s response came as a snore, he was sleeping again. “Now you idiot monkeys, what have I told you about eating and sleeping?” questioned the Professor as he flipped Devin out of his hammock and took the peanut butter can away from George. “Now, you four get out there and put on a show for those kind, wonderful, moneys, I… I mean people!” the professor said. All of the monkeys sighed and went out to the crowd and performed until they all dropped to the floor asleep. “Oh a charity,” the professor said as he was on the phone. “ “ Yes it’s for all of the underprivileged churches who can’t afford much .” Said a muffled voice on the other end. “Oh well that sounds very interesting.” Replied the professor with a sly grin. “ We would like you and your famous monkeys to perform in my church as a fundraiser .” “A fundraiser for those other churches, you mean, well, I’ll have to get back to you on that. Goodbye.” With that, the professor hung up the phone, put on his coat, hat, grabbed the large cage that the monkeys were in, and strutted out of the event center into the storm. “I’ve got it !” shrieked Grace. “What now?” shouted the other three in unison. “Okay, I know some of my other ideas have been a bust, but this one is gold.” “//Some// of the ideas, like what, the ones that almost got us all killed!” exclaimed Devin. “Well you know how the Professor loves his money.” “Ya.” “Well what if we knew a secret about his money that no one else did?” “Uhhhh, like what?” George asked. “He has a money machine!” exclaimed Grace. “Oh so now there’s a money machine?” asked Devin with a grin. “Uh, I think we should get you some help Grace.” Said Danna. “Ohh, will you three just listen!” “I saw the money machine when I was looking for my inhaler, I saw on the news that one just like it was missing. They say that it makes fake money. Soooo…” “If we could prove that the Professor was spending fake money, then we’d be free!” exclaimed George. “Exactly.” Said Grace, “Exactly.” After his morning drive the professor came up to his house only to find news vans. He ran to the door unlocked it and went in. “There he is!” shouted a police officer, “You are under arrest, you have the right to remain silent, anything you do or say can be used against you in the court of law.” Recited the officer. The professor was taken away, the machine was destroyed, and the monkeys, well the monkeys escaped and we’re now wanted for theft of peanut butter, asthma inhalers, and hammocks.





1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)? yes it is very original Yes it was vert original, just like lora said.
 * Starting - March 29 (2009): **

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed? It could have been more suspenseful but the rest was good. I think it could have been more exciting, but I thought the rest was good (:

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions? yeah i like the professor he is unusual but cool. I like the monkeys.

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see // and //hear // and //experience // the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story? not really it could have drawn a better picture. same as lora said

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author? for the most part it didn't really need anything. It doesn't really need anything, I really like it

comments by Lora :] other commments by Riley (:

Technical Details
1. Punctuation, grammar, word choice.
 * Starting - April 19 (2009): **<span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">

<span style="color: #4f81bd; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">The Alien King's Decision
1. On the level of story-telling: if you were the King (or the aliens), would you allow this story-teller to live another day? If no,why not?
 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif'; msobidifontfamily: 'Times New Roman'; msobidithemefont: minor-bidi;">Starting May 3 (2009): **<span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">

2. Be specific, try not to merely write, " this was good", instead explain what was good about it and why.

3. Nominate "Hall of Fame" stories.