ISKL+Althea,+Cristina

Introduction

Characters: -Alexis; a princess -John; her brother

Setting: Medieval World... -Land of the Demons (and Snow Land)

Problem: People from Demon land took over Snow Kingdom. Alexis and her brother go to Demon land to collect their land deeds and rights. But they only go there to find that it is full of assassins and soldiers to kill them so they don't have a chance to. They must now defeat the current lord :)

Once, long ago, there was a rich and powerful country; a place where war and suffering was non-existent, and thrived in the happiness of the people. However, this perfect utopia crumbled upon the callous tribe of people from the Land of Demons. The Land of the Demons had been in war with their country for 2 years and they had recently gained power over them. The people of Snow Land were devastated. Now, the long-lost Princess Alexis returns with her brother on a quest to bring back freedom to the land that is rightfully theirs... "Come on!" Princess Alexis shouted at her 15 year old brother. "We have to hurry if we are going to have any hope of saving Snow Kingdom!" Alexis and her brother, John, were on a quest. A dangerous quest to bring freedom back to their land! "I'm coming, I'm coming," answered her brother as he ran up to her, shaking his wavy dark hair out of his eyes. "We have to hurry if we will have any hope of arriving in the Land of the Demons by sundown tomorrow," whispered Alexis, "Now, do you remember the plan?" "Of course I remember" answered John in exasperation. "It's so simple. All we have to do is sail to the Land of the Demons, and make the deal that our mother told us to make with the ruler". ." "It may turn out more difficult than it sounds..." muttered Alexis. "Now come on, get in the boat!' Alexis wadded into the cold, dark sea and grabbed the first canoe she saw. She climbed in carefully and made her way to the back of the little boat. John struggled into the canoe and, in doing so, managed to get himself soaked from head to toe. "Oh, come on", taunted Alexis, "How can one person get so wet climbing into a canoe? I'm two years younger than you and I managed to get in without even getting my knees wet!" John scowled and clumsily sat down. Alexis sat down carefully, straightened her long black skirt, and picked up an oar. She motioned for her brother to do the same. She brushed her long, layered brown hair out of her eyes and began to slowly paddle backwards as she watched her brother do the same. They managed to turn the boat around and began to paddle forward in a slow, monotonous way. Alexis looked up at the beautiful night sky. We all share the same sky, she thought. //People all around the world, including the people from the Land of Demons, might too be gazing up at the same sky as I am right now.// She could just barely make out the moon, trying to shine through the clouds that covered the whole evening sky. Stars shone brightly, making it possible to see. It was all so beautiful that, for a few seconds, Alexis forgot about everything, but she managed to pull herself out of her deep thoughts and continued to concentrate on paddling as strongly as she could.The sea was calm but she knew that it wouldn't stay that way for long. She paddled harder. Alexis' arms were getting weaker and she was getting tired but she knew she must go on, for her land. So, she continued with her brother. The sky was getting darker. Alexis looked back and could hardly make out the land she called home. She could just see the towers of the palace, her home, towering above all of the other houses. She knew that she and her brother would have to stop soon, for it wasn't safe to travel at night, but she felt that they couldn't stop yet. If they wanted to get to the Land of Demons by sundown the next day, they would have to continue a little longer. An hour passed by slowly, as they continued, and then another. Alexis and her brother didn't speak. The sound of the water, splashing against the sides of the solid gold canoe, sliced into the silence of the night... While Alexis and her brother were paddling in the canoe they came to a very thin river with five hundred yard long walls on each side. The river was so thin that the siblings could barely paddle through it. "Man! This river is tiny," said John. "At least we can get the canoe in," Alexis replied. While they were paddling they could see tiny beaches on each side. Then Alexis remembered something, special about this river. It was that nothing is what it seems. "Hey, John do you remember what Mom said about this river?" asked Alexis. " Of course, it was that nothing is what it seems." replied John. "Soooo, if this looks like a nice tiny river then there must be something dangerous ahead like I don't know, maybe white water rapids!" yelled Alexis because coming up ahead were the most rough white water rapids that the siblings had ever seen. "Hang on!" yelled John. They crashed and turned and then their canoe flipped upside down and dumped them in the rapids! Thankfully they were strong swimmers and sucessfully swam to a tiny shore. "Are you Okay?" they asked each other. No one had any gashes or broken bones, but they had a lot of bruises and smaller cuts. Alexis asked "How are we going to get to the Land of Demons?" "I think we are in the Land of Demons," replied John. "Well then where are we in the Land of Demons?" asked Alexis. "I have no idea," replied John. After walking around for sometime and seeing nothing but a few trees and plants, they had to accept the awful truth. They were very, very lost, on a land that wanted them gone. "What are we going to do!!" moaned Alexis. She did not deal well with any kind of problem. "Don't worry", John comforted her, "Someone will find us, they have to." Alexis sighed and sat down on the cold, muddy ground. Her long silk skirt was getting dirty but she didn't care. "Why don't we stop for the night"? John mumbled. They both looked around for somewhere to spend the night. They finally found shelter under a huge oak tree that would protect them if there was any rain. Together, they gathered some leaves that they piled under the tree, to sleep on. Alexis tried to make herself comfortable on the rough leaves. It took a long time for her to fall asleep, while her brother fell asleep instantly. she was tired, but too frightened to doze off. Don't worry , she kept telling herself, we'll be okay  ... Alexis awoke a long time later. She tried to figure out what had caused her to wake up when she heard the gun shot, followed by a shout. She sat up, paranoid, what was going on. She quickly shook her brother awake and told him to listen. There was the gunfire again. They silently stood up and began to tiptoe towards the sound. They heard many voices, it sounded like there was a whole army of people. They turned a corner and then froze. There was the army. There seemed to be hundreds of people, and every single one of them was carrying a gun and, suddenly, glaring at them. For a second, they just stared at each other, but then, to Alexis' horror, the man who seemed to be the leader of all of them shouted, "GRAB THEM!" "RUN!" yelled John. They ran into the woods, heading towards the river. They soon heard the army gaining on them, but for some strange reason they did not shoot. //I wonder why they aren't shooting at us//, wondered Alexis. When they got to the river they realized they were to tired to swim. They knew now that they were trapped and most likely, goners. "Turn around you two," said a deep, gravelly voice. They turned around. "So what are the likes of you doing here?" asked the owner of the deep, gravelly voice, who looked like an admiral. "We are here on a diplomatic mission with the ruler of the Land of Demons," replied Alexis, in the proudest voice she could muster. "So you are the two brats that need to make a treaty with the king," said the "supposed" admiral. " We are not brats, we are here from direct orders from our king," John replied tartly. "You could be the king himself for all I care, I just know to send anyone I find goes directly to the castle dungeon," said the "supposed" admiral. "The DUNGEONS?!" Alexis squeaked.Then she realized something very strange."Excuse me sir, but why do have an army out here in the woods?" asked Alexis. "We do not have an army in the woods, this is just the border patrol," replied the "supposed" admiral. After that no one talked for the entire trip to the castle. When they did get to the castle Alexis thought it looked like and old evil cathedral that was five times it's normal size. Then the "supposed" admiral grabbed John and Alexis by the arms and dragged them through the large front door, down the hallway, and to a very large room were a man that was well built had everything black on including cloak, tunic, breeches, shoes, crown and even his sword was black. He then stood up and asked drowsily, "Admiral who are these two commoners?" "We're not commoners, I'm Prince John of Snow Land and this is my sister, Princess Alexis, and we have come here to make a treaty with the king," replied John in the most dignified voice Alexis had ever heard him in. "Oh so your from Snowland eh, for some reason I thought you would be taller.Never mind let's get down to business, you want to make a treaty with me right?" asked the King. "Yes," John and I said. "So, all you have to do is sign here, here, and here," said the King, pointing to certain parts of a document that had just appeared. We looked at each other and realized. What do we have to lose? "Okay here you go," said John as he signed his signature and then I signed mine. "Well there is no reason for you two too stay here any longer," said the King. Then the weirdest thing happened that I will never forget. Right when the King had said those words the room started to melt and in place a our Great Hall, with our mother on the throne. "I'm guessing it went well?" asked our mom. We nodded our heads. "An yes you can go upstairs and take showers," said our mom, who must have read the look on our faces. We nodded our head in thanks and raced upstairs to take the longest showers in our lives. THE END PEER REVIEW (Saint Michael)

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?  The plot is original and creative :] 2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed? Yes it was satisfying :) 3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions? You gave a good description of the characters and we have a sense of what the characters are like. 4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?** The details were reeaally good :)) you described all of the events and we could actually picture your description of their adventure :]] ** 5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author? We think that the ending of the story seems a bit unfinished...because after ALL the adventure the characters faced, all they had to do was sign a treaty that the king (calmly) said to sign...
 * The ending was good! Thank you for adding that :D 