Brian

** **Grade:8Th** **Siblings: 2 sisters.** Feel free to upload your podcast or a picture if you like.
 * **Hi, my name is Brian
 * Best Holiday: Cristmas **
 * Birth Month: november **
 * Career Goals: Paintball Player **
 * Favorite Band(s): Virtue **
 * Favorite Food: Deer **
 * Favorite Munchies: Ice Cream **
 * Favorite soft drink: Dr.Pepper **
 * Favorite Subject: Computers. **
 * Pet Peeve: **
 * Pets: Dogs/Cats **

PAINTBALL By Brian Pennella

Alex Lindgevist is a semi pro paintball player. Alex just recently got excepted to two pro teams, Dynasty and RL. He has two brothers, a mom named June and a dad named Jason. His brothers both hunt but don’t really play paintball. Alex is having a really hard time choosing teams because Dynasty is in California and RL is in Boston. Jason said “Alex did you decide which team to play for?” Alex said, “Well I’m not exactly sure but I think Russions legion.” Jason said “why?” Alex said, “because there are a lot of good reasons and benefits. Like it is close by in Boston, it has good health insurance and it is sponsored by Virtuo, Luke, and Rock Stire. So I can get all my paintball equipment free”. Jason said, “that’s good to know”.

The next day Alex had make up his mind and went to the manager of RL and signed all of the papers he needed to. The manager said “we should practice tomorrow”. Alex said “great”. Alex went home and told his dad about his day and Jason said “you better get some rest if you have practice tomorrow.” Alex said “That’s true see you in the morning.

Alex woke up and went to the field he got to the field at 6:00 a.m. but no one was there. He waited two hours for the team to show up. The manager laughed and said, “What time did you get here?” As the team set up, Alex said 6:00 a.m. The manager said, lets see your equipment. Alex took out a Ego green and black with stock board and dye ultra light barrel and a mini velocity hopper. Then he took out his clothes, a custom jersey from his old team and a eight pod pack. The manager said, “after practice you will come with me and we will get better equipment”. Then he walked out to the field with Alex following.

The first thing they did was stretch. Alex is used to it so he did fine. The practice was pretty much the same as his semi pro team’s. The stretches, the runs and did a bunch of shooting exercises like side shooting, bunkering and more. Then they practiced dodging balls, 3V1 to improve clutching, stepping through the plays and to top it off they went over to the bench and went over there plays.

After the practice the manager said, “there first game is in two weeks and if you do good then you will be on the main team playing every one to two weeks. So lets get you some good equipment. Alex said, “that sounds good”. They got to the RL store and the manager took down a custom luxe. Alex has never seen a gun that good. It was white lasered with the mini red RL sign. It has a custom RL virtue board, a halo hopper with a RL sign on it and it had a custom dye ultra light barrel with white to red RL signs on it. The manager said, that’s your game gun, what color do you want your practice gun to be. Alex said, “OD Green”. The manager took out a OD Green Luxe, same board and black halo hopper. It was still able to shoot 40 bps but didn’t look as good. Then the manager said, “what size are you and Alex said, large.” The manager took 7 special edition RL practice jerseys and pants and gave it to him. He took an RL pack and gave him two. Then the manager said, “ I will have your game jersey in one week and I will see you tomorrow. Then Alex said, “OK and thanks for the equipment.

Alex Lindequist went on to win the world cup four times in a row.

Questions for Peer Reviewers

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)? The plot was interesting because i don't know anything about paintball. It's cool that he got into a good team and went onto winning four world cups. 2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed? The character doesn't have much of a problem except in the beginning to decide which team he wants to join. You could add that he hurts got hurt 3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions? From the story you understand that Alex likes paintball, but that's about it. The character seems life-like but you could add more emotion, like he enthusiastically said ... 4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story? You could add more details about the way he reacts to things but i thought it was good the way you described the paintball guns towards the end.

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author? Throughout the story you could add more of what he thinks of everything...if he's excited or anxious. You should explain what some of the terms in paintball are.

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author?

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author? ||