SMS+Group+8

=SMS Group 8=

Introductions
Meet Shalan Meet Maddy

 **Part 1-The Mall**  “Oh Shelly, would you stop complaining!”  “ I am trying to look for a shell that complements my figure and all your doing is whining about your contacts!”  “It's not my fault I vacuumed them up, you're the one who left them on the sofa! If you want, on our way out we can get you new ones.”  Just to inform you on what's going on, this morning I was sitting in the sofa reading my book and my eyes started to hurt so I took my contacts out. But when Squirt started vacuuming, I couldn't concentrate, so I left the room. I forgot my contacts on the sofa and when I returned to get them, they were gone. Well, right now we're on our way to the Kelp Café; every Friday Squirt and I go shopping at the Coral Reef Mall. As you can see, Squirt is my materialistic best friend, where I am the worry wart bookworm.  It was when we were eating some seaweed when we felt our eggs move and realized it was time to lay them on our island. “Honey, it's Shelly, Squirt and I have to go lay our eggs, we'll be back for the big game.”  “Sweetie, it's Squirt, yeah it's time to lay our eggs, we'll be home soon.”  Squirt and I were on our way to our island where we have hatched everyone of our past eggs, when Squirt saw the shell she has been looking for. We just //had//  to stop, so we did. Squirt bought her shell and we were on our way again. Part 2- The Game   “Touch down!!” said my over-weight best friend, Brok. Brok and I, Squish, were watching the big sea horse game on my new deep-def TV. We have been best friends since kinderreef. The thing is, Brok was only friends with me because he felt sorry for me. He thought for some weird reason that I was dying of a disease and when he said that to me, I said, “Why did you think that I was dying?”  “You looked a little pale and you were always weezing. People always stay away from you so I thought you were contagious.” said Brok. I told Brok that I had allergies and that people stayed away from me because they thought I was weird. Right at that moment, we became best friends. Brok accepted me for who I was and wasn't afraid like everyone else. Well, back to the present...   As we got up for a snack break, we discovered that there was no more kelp chips so we decided to go get some more at the grocery store. Brok said he would go since he was the host, so I said, “okay,” and off he went. **Part 3** <span style="font-family: Broadway, fantasy;"> When we got to our island, we saw something terrible had happened. The islanders had littered garbage everywhere along the island perimeter. We could hardly walk ! We saw that other turtles had come here to lay their eggs. There on the beach was a perfect example of why the ozone layer is fading! <span style="font-family: Broadway, fantasy;"> “Wow...who would do this? This should be illegal!” said the angriest Squirt I have ever seen. And what do you know right then I heard a familiar voice say. “Well actually... I am feeling pretty good today thank you and I very much agree with you, these islanders really know how to ruin lives!” <span style="font-family: Broadway, fantasy;">We both knew this voice very well, for it was the voice of our good friend Scuttle. Squirt, Scuttle and I have known each other for what seems like forever. When ever we needed him he was there right at the right moment. <span style="font-family: Broadway, fantasy;"> We both ran to him and started the longest conversation in the history of talking: “Well its hard to believe that they would do this when they know that all these turtles come here to lay their eggs.” I started. It would take up too much time to tell you the rest of our conversation so I will just let you in on some key information, first of all there is too much litter to lay our eggs as Squirt said, and another thing is that how will the babies survive, added Scuttle. What would we do without him? <span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;">**Part 4** <span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;"> I no the market isn't to far away, so I decided to help Brok with the bags. I thought maybe he decided to buy more than one thing, so I was on my way out when the phone rang. I answered since there was no hurry. But then I remembered Brok and his groceries. I went outside and smelled the fresh salt water aroma, and started across the front lawn when I saw a fat, chubby flipper, which I knew had to be Brok. I went over to it and it seemed lifeless. I started to call the hospital but then I saw it move. I pulled Brok out of the hole that he seemed to be stuck in and just like Brok he was completely freaking out. <span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;"> I pulled him out and when I saw him I was speechless. There around his neck was something all sea turtles were afraid of... a six pack plastic soda holder! I could see that Brok was still breathing but only had a few hours left. I rushed him to the hospital but we had to wait in the waiting room for a while. When the doctor finally called us in, he was as speechless as I was. “Please help us. Is there anything you can do to save him?” <span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;"> “I'm not sure. How long has he been like this?” <span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;"> “I think around fifteen minuets, I found him in a hole outside his house.” the doctor told us he might have a chance if we act quickly. They decided to go into surgery to cut it off but they think Brok is too fat and it would be risky, but they would try anyways. While Brok was in surgery, I called Squirt and Shelly to let them know what had happened in the past few hours. “Squirt and Shelly, I have some bad news and some good news.” <span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;"> “ What is it? Tell us the good news first.” <span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;"> “Brok might be OK but he has a small chance.” <span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;"> “What happened to Brok?!” <span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;"> “He ran into a six pack plastic soda holder but he's going into surgery as we speak.” <span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;"> <span style="font-family: Broadway, fantasy;">Part 5 <span style="font-family: Broadway, fantasy;"> “Come on girls, we can clean this before they come.” Squirt and I both know that. <span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;">**Part 6** <span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;">The phone is ringing..........”Hello?” Shelly answered.”I have some bad news.” “Oh no.” She answered.”What happened?”. ............  “<span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS, cursive;">Brok...Brok.....Brok is...is....dead.”

PEER REVIEW

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author?

PEER REVIEW (group 2)

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author?

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