CI-Jesse

1001 Flat Tales Project  My Name: Jesse Richards My Age: 13 My Hometown: Aurora, Illinois My Hobbies: Sports and reading. My Favorites: Color: Green, Animal: All of them, Subject: Language. Other things you should know about me: I have blonde hair and blue eyes. I am tall (5’5). I am an animal lover.   “Mr. Trescot!” screamed Mrs. Pollen  “Huh? Wha. . . Where am I?” I asked as I was rudely woken from my nap.  “You’re at school.” Said Mrs. Pollen “You fell asleep and missed my whole lesson. Well lucky for you, you can come in AFTER SCHOOL and I will gladly teach it to you.” “Oh um. . . . . Mrs. Pollen. I can’t. I have to uh. . . uh. . . see my dad. He’s in the uh. . . . hospital.” //Way to go Chad!// I thought to myself. “Oh, well I am sorry about that. Um. . . tomorrow I will give you the notes,” answered Mrs. Pollen. //<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">Wow, that was my best yet. And she actually bought this one. I hope she doesn’t call my dad and ask him. //<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';"> I thought to myself. Okay Okay. I know. I am a huge liar. But I haven’t slept in such a long time because there are these weird noises coming from just outside my window. And I can’t put my finger on it, but I think I know what it is. I am pretty sure that my neighbors are dumping all of their trash into the lake behind me. //No wonder my mom never lets me go swimming in there anymore.// One time I even heard somebody’s trash can drop to the ground with a big //THUD!// This needs to be put to an end. All of this polluting is going to kill us. I know exactly what – //<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">RING! RING! //<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';"> “Class you are dismissed. And Mr. Trescot,” Mrs. Pollen yelled at me before I left for lunch, “tell your dad I said get better soon.” <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“Sure thing!” I called back to her. Anyway, I know exactly what I am going to do. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“Hey guys!” I called after my friends. They turned around and looked at me like I was crazy. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“What? What it is? Is there something on my face?!” I quickly brought my hands to my face and rubbed it so anything that was on there was gone by now. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“No, no. Just look behind you.” My friend Jared told me. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">I froze. What could be behind me? There is only one thing that would make them look at me that way. And that was the school bully, Adam Sickly. This kid is the meanest of all the bullies that were here at Silver park middle school. I’m an 8th grader and he still scares me. He doesn’t care about anything. Except for himself. He has dumped me in the school trash can and then dumped me and the trash can into the lake. He’s been held back since he was in the 8th grade. He is 15 years old. He is the main person who likes to dump trash. And I need to find a way to stop him. I have a plan! I just ran to the lunch line before I got dumped into the lake. . .again. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“SPLAT!” “There’s your mashed potatoes.” The lunch lady told me. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“THEY’RE GREEN!” I screamed. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“Toughen up!” She screamed back at me. By that time the whole lunchroom was looking my way. And soon I could feel the warm, stinky breath from Adam, who was right behind me. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“I believe we have some business to get over and done with. How would you like to go for a swim? With some trash buddies to swim with?!” whispered Adam in my ear. //Oh no! Not again!!!// I thought to myself. Before I could even react, the green mashed potatoes were down my pants and I was in the trash can. //I guess today isn’t the day I am going to stop Adam from polluting our lake.// //No, today will be the day.// I jumped out of the trash can and looked Adam straight in the eyes. I could feel the mashed potatoes go down my pants. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“Hey twerp! What do you –“ <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“No, you listen to me from now on! I am sick and tired of you trying to take over this school! And my name is Chad, no longer twerp.” I screamed at Adam. He just looked at me, with wide eyes. //Finally. I did it. I stood up for myself.// All the sudden it went dark, and I realized that Adam put the trash can over my head. I threw it off. By this time the anger in his eyes turned to fury. I just waited to be wailed on. But it never came. I opened my eyes and saw that Adam was not angry anymore. He looked like he was almost going to cry. But he straighten up and bent down to whisper in my ear. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“I’m sorry.” That’s all he said before he walked away. //<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">I did it! Yes. He apologi //<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">zed //to me! Woo-hoo!// <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“Now for the rest of you. I need your help. Who likes to swim?” Just about everybody raised their hands. “Okay that’s good. But who likes to wait till summer to swim? I know I don’t. So I need your help to clean up the lake. So then we can swim with our friends without having to pay to get in or waiting in line. You just come and hop in. WHO’S WITH ME?!?!?!” The whole cafeteria was just an up-roar. Everybody screamed. I was going to have the cleanest lake in Chicago. The cleanest lake was in my backyard. And now it is going to look b-e-a-utiful when I get done with it. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">So it’s been about 3 weeks since my little speech about the lake and you know what? I feel really good with myself. Well the lake isn’t all the way clean but it sure is going to look beautiful when we are done. I had a big outcome. There was tons of people who decided that they wanted to help with the lake. So I guess that I touched many people with my little speech. Wow. I am good. Well my mom was kind of upset when the principle called home and told my mom about my little up-roar. Well it doesn’t matter now. She realized that I did it for a good cause. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">It’s been about a month and a half and the lake is now clean. So many people come to the lake now. I am so glad that I stood up for myself. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“Hey Chad!” yelled Jared at the edge of the lake. <span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">“I’m on my way down right now!” I yelled just before I made my way to the lake with a big SPLASH! <span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';"> <span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';"> <span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';"> <span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';"> 1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?
 * __<span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">My Story __**__<span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';"> (Paste Here) __
 * <span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif'; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi;">Starting - March 29 (2009): **<span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //<span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif'; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi;">see // and //<span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif'; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi;">hear // and //<span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif'; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi;">experience // the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author?

<span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';"> Technical Details
1. Punctuation, grammar, word choice.
 * <span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif'; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi;">Starting - April 19 (2009): **<span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">

<span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';"> The Alien King's Decision
1. On the level of story-telling: if you were the King (or the aliens), would you allow this story-teller to live another day? If no,why not?
 * <span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif'; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi;">Starting May 3 (2009): **<span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic','sans-serif';">

2. Be specific, try not to merely write, " this was good", instead explain what was good about it and why.

3. Nominate "Hall of Fame" stories.