SMS+Group+9

=SMS Group 9=

Introductions
Meet Mairead Meet Talia

Story
The Lonely Princess Once upon a time... There was a princess named Jennifer who lived with her family in a beautiful castle. As she grew up, her parents were never around so they hired a nanny. Jennifer always got excited when her nanny came because she would spoil her with candy for breakfast, lunch, and dinner! She was thirteen years old and overweight.

One day, her parents finally came home. They noticed how plump she had become and blamed it on the nanny. Jennifer begged on her knees, “Please don't fire her! She was the best nanny I've ever had!” “She's making you overweight,” her mom replied. “Princesses are supposed to be slim and graceful, not fat.” Her dad said, “We have no choice but to fire her.” Jennifer ran up to her room and slammed the door on them. She cried all night.

The next day her mother told her “Jennifer, your father and I have talked about this and decided to send you to a camp.” “WHAT?!” Jennifer said. “Honey, we want you to loose some weight and no one will be around to take care of you," her father explained. Jennifer ran out of the castle and into the garden sobbing. She saw her sister there and was about to walk somewhere else but her sister had already caught her eye and said “Hold up, Jen!” “I want to talk to you!” Jennifer's sister got up and walked over to her. They walked around the garden talking about how going to the camp would help Jennifer. “Jen, this camp is really going to help you.” “But-” “Just trust me,” her sister interrupted. “Okay.”

That night Jennifer started to pack her bags. After that talk with her sister, she had changed her mind about going to the camp. She was actually kind of excited to go to the camp and meet new people. She went to bed wondering what things she would experience at this new camp. She woke up the next morning very happy. Her parents were shocked at how she was acting because she was extremely upset when they told her that she was going to the camp. They didn't want to ruin her mood so they didn't bother to ask her why she was so happy. Jennifer said her good byes to her family and walked into the bus filled with girls.

She sat alone but a friendly girl walked over and asked, “Can I sit with you?” Jennifer nods her head and they start talking. “So, what's your name,” the girl asked. “Jennifer, what's yours?” “My name is Stacey,” she said. “Are you excited for the camp,” Stacey asked. “I'm kinda nervous but excited at the same time.” “It'll be fine. Don't worry,” Stacey said.

They finally arrived at the camp! They all got out and met the camp counselor. “Hey everybody! My name is Casey! We're here to have some fun with outdoor activities, like rock climbing, nature walks, scavenger hunts, roasting marshmallows and telling scary stories around the campfire! But first thing's first, you all have to put your things in your cabins. Then we'll all meet up at the lake for your first activity! See you then!” “I like her,” said Jennifer. “Yeah, me too,” replied Stacey as they were walking to their cabin. “Lets go to the lake!”

Stacey and Jennifer walked to the lake together to meet up with everyone. Then they all went on a nature walk together to get to know each other. They finally got back and it was onto the next activity, rock climbing. Jennifer was really nervous so Casey came over and talked to her. “Jennifer, it's okay to be nervous but you still have to try.” “Okay,” Jennifer said, “I'll go first.” Through the whole camp, Jennifer did this in every activity and accomplished many goals with her confidence.

It was the end of camp and Jennifer gained confidence and lost some weight, with the help of Camp Counselor Casey and her friend Stacey. Through the whole camp and all their activities, they helped her believe in herself, that no matter how you look on the outside, you can still do whatever you want to, if you believe in yourself.

By Talia and Mairead

PEER REVIEW

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?

I liked the plot it was very interesting and fun to read.

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

The problem of her being fat is interesting and funny.

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions? The characters are very awesome. I like the fat girl she seems really attractive.

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

I can picture the people and the scene

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author?

PEER REVIEW (group 2)

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author?