SO-Kelly+M.

Introduction:
Kelly, in school i like lunch this is also my fav. subject out of school i like to play soccer softball and basketball soccer is my favorite sport. my favorite food is pizza from sammys. i am 11 years old and in sixth grade. my fav. video game is anything that has to do with WII. my favorite song is BOOM BOOM POW by the black eyed pees with fergy. i have visited many places in my life the farthest place i have ever bean is california. when i am older i plan to be a perfetional soccer play like Hope Solo she is also my idol.

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Hello, I am investigator Kelly McIlhargey. I am investigating the possible theft of a pizza from Pasquale’s Pizzeria last night. These are our suspects: Jack, a marine and our #1 suspect. Brandon is also a marine, and is Jacks best friend, and is Jack’s assistant. Kit is jacks girl friend, who we thought could tell us where he was late yesterday afternoon.” I have a case to solve, and this is the information… Last night at 6:00 p.m., the chief at Pasquale’s Pizzeria reported that two men came into the pizzeria to pick up a pizza. We asked him where there was a quite place in the pizzeria he said we could go in to the meat room. We got in and there was big meat hitting our face as we saw a few chairs one for the chief and I; we started with some easy questions. We asked who the pizza was for and the chef went on from there. “The pizza was for a ‘JB.’ He set the pizza on the counter and turned around to check the bill. When chef turned around to Brandon and Jack, the pizza was in one of the man’s hands and they were both heading for the doorway. I yelled for them to stop, but they ran out of the door with the pizza. I ran after them and yelled Stop loonatickes; yet, lost sight of them on 62nd Street.” The chef said. The chief said that one of his costumers saw it all from the people coming in to the restaurant to the chase and the capture of the Men. We asked her to come in to our questioning room we asked her what she all heard and saw. “The chef returned to the restaurant and called the police after the two men left the restaurant. A few minutes after the call, I saw two men running on 62nd Street out side the restaurant and attacked him they squirmed but luckily caught them.” That’s all I know, I’m sorry I don’t know anything else. At that point I had to make a rough decision: the two men were that stole the pizza were Jack and Brandon. Jack was carrying a pizza box from Pasquale’s Pizzeria. They both denied stealing the pizza. Brandon claimed to have found the pizza on the in the trash. Is it a case of mistaken identity? I will solve this case soon with more information. I went to Jack’s apartment and met with his girlfriend Kit. She said it was around dinner time yesterday when she sent Jack out to get pizza. She knew that he had done dumb things in the past, some crimes, so she sent his best friend Brandon with him. Brandon was a cute boy who got away with things because of his good looks. The next thing she knew, Jack called from the jail saying that Brandon and I were arrested for stealing the pizza. Jack told her that he was incorrect, and that they had found the pizza in a trash can. Kit admitted that the story seemed strange, but she no evidence but not to believe Jack. Kit sure loved Jack and wanted him out of Jail, she may have not had anything to prove that Jack was innocent but they made a commitment never not believe each other when there in trouble so she stuck to that and didn’t know what to do. That is all she told us as she cried her eyes out. I went to the jail and met with Jack and Brandon. They stared at me in amazement wondering what I was going to ask; I had to get something out of them. “Jack,” I said, “you’re up first.” He walked in a dark gloomy room with black and gray wall paper. “Were you ever in Pasquale’s Pizzeria?” I asked Jack. Jack said “We were going to Pasquale’s Pizzeria, but we didn’t make it. On the way, we stopped to look at stereos (I broke it yesterday). When we came out of the stereo store we found a pizza box sitting on the side walk. I opened it and there was a fresh pizza in it. I looked around and didn’t see anyone, so Brandon picked it up and we left. The pizza was getting cold, so we began to run back to my apartment when a police officer jumped us and said we stole the pizza.” Next I talked to Brandon I asked Brandon if he stole the pizza. He said, “No I didn’t, I would never do such a thing.” He claimed that he found the pizza. I could not get them to admit to stealing the pizza. I went to the pizzeria and dusted for fingerprints on the counter. I found fingerprints, and they were found out to belong to Jack and Brandon! I showed the baker pictures of Jack and Brandon. He said that they were the two men that came into the pizzeria and stole a pizza. =====

** 3 MOUNTH LATER ** ** COURT DAY **** JUDGE TODAY: JUDGE JUDY **
We all walked into the white walled room with empty seats and chairs, one for each of us. There was a large desk in the front and higher up, with a mallet that said Judge Judy. I showed the jury the evidence that I had such as the finger prints and the baker came luckily he sat in the chare next to the judge. We asked him all about the mystery he said exactly what we wanted to here. Jack and Brandon were nervous and sweaty. I knew that I had them. It was there turn to sit in the chair they both shared the same chair. I asked them confusing questions they wouldn’t brake until 1 question the magic question they cracked and gave up because I was going to hard (ha ha ha). After all of the evidence was shown, and all of the questions were asked, the jury made a decision. I sat there with a big smile on my face but inside I was praying my heart out I would get this case solved. They decided that Jack and Brandon were guilty of stealing the pizza. They had to pay the baker for the pizza, and volunteer at the food shelter. Now I thought they should have gone to jail and stayed there for life, but no just the easy work. Hopefully they learned their lesson, and won’t try to steal anything again not even a toy from a little girl. If not, they will have to face super duper investigator Kelly McIlhargey again.

**Questions for Peer Reviewers**
(Think in terms of questions you would like to ask the author.)

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) What suggestions do you have for the author(s)?

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? What details would you like to see in the next revision of the story?

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? What suggestions do you have for the author?